Swing Advice Nobody Actually Believes

Last month, I was conducting a group clinic when something fascinating happened. I'd just finished demonstrating a common drill for maintaining spine angle through impact—one I've taught hundreds of times.

"Any questions?" I asked the group of eight golfers.

Silence. Nodding heads. A few murmurs of "Makes sense, Coach."

Then, as I was packing up, one of the participants approached me privately. "Coach, can I be honest? I don't think that drill actually helps most people. It never worked for me."

Over the next ten minutes, three other participants came up separately, each sharing a similar confession. They all thought the drill was questionable, but none wanted to speak up in front of the group.

The irony hit me immediately: I had just led a session where everyone publicly agreed with advice that most of them privately questioned.

We'd all just taken a trip to Abilene.

The Emperor's New Golf Swing

There's a Danish fairy tale you might remember from childhood. An emperor loves fine clothes, and two con artists arrive claiming they can weave him an extraordinary suit—one that will be invisible to anyone unfit for their position or hopelessly foolish.

The swindlers set up empty looms and pretend to weave. When officials check the progress, they see nothing, but remembering the warning about appearing foolish, they praise the non-existent work. The emperor visits, sees nothing, but terrified of being exposed as unfit, declares it "magnificent."

He parades through the city completely naked while the crowd cheers for clothes that don't exist until a child shouts the obvious truth: "But he's completely naked!"

This children's story perfectly captures one of the most dangerous dynamics in golf instruction and improvement.

We're all walking around praising swing advice we don't actually believe works, afraid to be the one who admits we can't see the magic everyone else claims to see.

The Abilene Paradox in Golf

The term "Abilene Paradox" comes from management expert Jerry Harvey, who described how his family once drove fifty miserable miles to Abilene for dinner, only to discover afterward that no one had actually wanted to go. They'd each agreed, thinking everyone else was excited about the plan.

The Abilene Paradox occurs when a group collectively decides on a course of action that none of its members actually support, because each person mistakenly believes the others do.

Once you understand this paradox, you'll see it everywhere in golf:

In Instruction: Everyone nods along when a famous instructor teaches a particular method, even though half the students privately doubt it works for them. Nobody wants to be the one who "doesn't get it."

In Equipment: A playing group all switches to the latest driver because everyone assumes the others genuinely believe it's better. Turns out, they each liked their old driver fine but didn't want to seem behind the times.

In Practice Routines: Golfers adopt elaborate practice regimens they read about, not because they actually think it's the best use of their time, but because everyone else seems to be doing it.

In Playing Style: A golfer plays conservatively on every hole because they think that's what "good course management" means, even though they enjoy aggressive golf. They're following advice nobody actually believes leads to more enjoyment.

In Definitions of Success: Players grind to lower their handicap because they think that's what they're supposed to care about, even though they'd rather just enjoy time with friends. They're pursuing a goal nobody actually wants but everyone assumes others do.

My Own Trip to Abilene

I spent the first five years of my coaching career teaching the "proper" swing sequence exactly as I'd been taught to teach it. Proper grip, proper stance, proper backswing position, proper downswing sequence.

My students would nod along. They'd work on these positions. Some improved, many didn't. But nobody questioned whether this methodical approach was actually the best path for recreational golfers.

Then one day, a frustrated student finally said what others had probably been thinking: "Coach, I don't think I can learn this way. My brain doesn't work like this. Can we try something different?"

That honest admission changed my entire coaching philosophy. I started asking students what actually made sense to them instead of assuming everyone needed the same technical approach. I discovered that many golfers I'd been teaching "the right way" had privately been struggling with methods they didn't believe in, but were too polite or too worried about seeming difficult to speak up.

We'd all been on a long, uncomfortable ride to Abilene, me included.

The Swing Thoughts Nobody Believes

Let me give you some specific examples of golf's naked emperor moments - advice that gets repeated constantly, that everyone nods along with, but that many golfers privately doubt:

"Keep your head still": Everyone says it. Everyone teaches it. But watch any tour player and their head moves through impact. Yet golfers keep trying to freeze their head because they think everyone else has mastered this "fundamental."

"Slow backswing, fast downswing": It sounds good. Everyone agrees in theory. But most people who try to consciously create this tempo end up with jerky, disconnected swings. They keep trying because they assume it's working for everyone else.

"Grip pressure should be light": Every instructor mentions it. Every golfer nods. But half of them immediately grip tighter again because light grip pressure doesn't actually feel secure to them—they just won't admit it.

"Visualize every shot": Sounds professional. Sounds like what good golfers do. But many players find that detailed visualization actually creates more anxiety than confidence. They keep doing it because they think everyone else finds it helpful.

"Practice your weaknesses": Makes logical sense. Everyone agrees. Yet many golfers have more fun and improve faster by building on their strengths. They just feel guilty about it because conventional wisdom says otherwise.

None of these are necessarily wrong. But they've become gospel that golfers follow even when they doubt their effectiveness.

The Cost of the Parade

Here's what happens when we all keep marching in the parade, cheering for clothes that don't exist:

Wasted Time: You spend months or years working on advice you don't actually believe in, hoping it will eventually click, when you could be exploring approaches that actually resonate with you.

Lost Confidence: When the "proven" method doesn't work for you, you assume you're the problem. You think everyone else has figured it out and you're just not getting it. Your confidence erodes.

Unnecessary Frustration: You keep doing things that don't feel right because you think they should feel right. The disconnect between what you're told to feel and what you actually feel creates constant frustration.

Missed Opportunities: By following the conventional path everyone pretends to believe in, you miss the chance to discover unconventional approaches that might actually work better for your unique brain and body.

The Child in the Crowd

So how do you become the child in the crowd—the one willing to state the obvious truth?

Ask Yourself the Uncomfortable Question: Do I actually believe this advice works for me, or am I just afraid to say I don't?

This requires brutal honesty. Not "does this sound good?" or "do smart people recommend this?" but "do I genuinely believe this is helping my golf game?"

Test Your Assumptions: Don't just accept that something works because everyone says it does. Test it. Track it. Measure it. If keeping your head still isn't actually improving your ball striking, stop doing it regardless of how many people say you should.

Give Yourself Permission to Dissent: You're allowed to think differently. You're allowed to discover that popular advice doesn't work for you. You're allowed to say, "I know everyone loves this method, but it's not clicking for me."

Find Your Own Path: Once you stop following the parade, you can start exploring what actually works. Maybe you learn better through feel than positions. Maybe you improve faster working on strengths than weaknesses. Maybe you enjoy golf more when you ignore scoring entirely.

Your Invitation to Honesty

Here's what I want you to do: Make a list of all the golf advice you're currently following. Every swing thought, every practice routine, every strategic approach, every piece of conventional wisdom you're implementing.

Then ask yourself honestly: Which of these do I genuinely believe works for me? Which am I only doing because I think I'm supposed to?

Be ruthless. If you can't point to concrete evidence that something is actually helping your game, and if it doesn't feel intuitively right to you, it might be part of the emperor's wardrobe.

The Antidote to Abilene

The antidote to the Abilene Paradox is courage and clarity. The willingness to ask uncomfortable questions. The boldness to say, "I know everyone else sees the beautiful clothes, but I see an empty loom."

In golf, this means:

• Questioning popular instruction that doesn't resonate with you

• Admitting when trendy techniques aren't working

• Following your own path even when it looks different from others

• Prioritizing what actually improves your game over what sounds impressive

One honest voice can save an entire group from a long, painful trip to Abilene.

Be that voice in your own golf journey.

Stop nodding along with advice you don't actually believe. Stop following practice routines that don't make sense to you. Stop marching in parades for teaching methods that aren't producing results.

The emperor is naked. And it's okay to say so.

Your best golf won't come from following the advice everyone pretends to believe. It will come from having the courage to pursue what actually works for you.

Think About This

What golf advice are you currently following not because you've seen it work for you, but because you're afraid of being the only one who admits it doesn't? And what would change in your game if you had the courage to stop pretending?

Until next time, less swing thoughts, more great shots!

Owen.