The Three Attitudes That'll Change Your Game

I've been coaching Francois for about six months now, and technically, his game has come a long way. His swing mechanics are solid, his short game is sharp, and he understands course management better than most players at his level. Yet something was holding him back from breaking through to consistently lower scores.

Last Tuesday's round gave me the clarity I needed about what that something was.

The Storm Clouds Gather

It started on the 3rd hole. Francois had been playing well through the first two holes, but when his approach shot caught the bunker instead of finding the green, I watched his entire demeanour shift. His shoulders sagged, he let out an exasperated sigh, and muttered something about "just my luck."

"Tough break," I said as we walked toward the sand.

"Story of my life, Coach," he replied, already resigned to a poor outcome before he'd even stepped into the bunker.

I made a mental note but didn't say anything yet. Sometimes you need to let the round reveal the pattern.

By the 7th tee, the pattern was crystal clear. A slight pull into the rough had Francois shaking his head and complaining about the pin placement. A reasonable lie in the fairway bunker on 9 became "impossible" because of how the ball was sitting down ever so slightly. When his playing partner made a comment about the greens being a bit slower than usual, Francois immediately latched onto that as the reason his putting had been off.

I'd seen enough.

The First Conversation

"Francois, I want to talk about something I'm noticing."

"Let me guess—my tempo's off again?"

"No, your swing is fine. It's your attitude I'm concerned about." I paused, choosing my words carefully. "Tell me, how are you feeling out here today?"

He looked surprised by the question. "Frustrated, honestly. Nothing's going my way."

"And how do you think that's affecting your golf?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, watch your body language after a shot doesn't go exactly as planned. Your shoulders get tight, your breathing gets shallow, and suddenly that smooth swing we've worked on becomes forced and mechanical."

We reached the 10th tee, and I had him take a practice swing. "Now take that same swing, but this time, I want you to smile while you do it."

He looked at me like I was crazy, but he did it.

"Feel different?"

"Actually... yeah. More relaxed."

"That's the first quality I want you to work on today: be cheerful. I'm not asking you to be a clown, but bring some positive energy to your game. Golf throws curveballs—that's part of its charm. When you're pleasant and upbeat, you stay relaxed, and a relaxed golfer is a good golfer."

The Blame Game

The real test came on the 12th hole. Francois pushed his drive into the trees and immediately started looking around for external causes. "These tees are set up terribly," he began.

I stopped him mid-sentence.

"Francois, who was holding the club?"

"What?"

"Who was holding the club when you hit that shot?"

"I was, but—"

"No buts. You were holding the club. You made the swing. You chose the target." I kept my tone firm but supportive. "Here's the second quality I need you to embrace: be accountable. When you blame the course, the weather, or bad luck, you give away your power to improve."

We found his ball in a decent lie between two trees. "Now, instead of complaining about this situation, what can you learn from it? What adjustment will you make on the next drive?"

He thought for a moment. "Maybe I aimed too close to the trouble. I should have played more conservatively to the left side."

"Perfect. Now you're taking ownership, and that gives you something actionable to work with."

When Plans Fall Apart

The weather turned on us around the 15th hole. The wind picked up significantly, and what had been soft greens were now starting to firm up. I watched Francois's frustration build as his usual yardages weren't working anymore as his ball ran to the back of the green.

"This is ridiculous," he said after his approach shot ran over the green on 16. "How are you supposed to play in conditions like this?"

"Same way the guys on tour do it every week," I replied. "You adapt."

We sat down on a bench near the 16th tee. "Francois, this brings me to the third quality: be adaptable. The golf course is a living thing. Conditions change, lies are rarely perfect, and every round presents new challenges."

"But my distances are all off now."

"So adjust them. That's what good golfers do. They don't need everything to be perfect to play well. They find ways to score even when things aren't ideal."

I pulled out his yardage book. "Look, instead of fighting the wind, let's use it. This hole plays downwind now. Instead of your usual 7-iron, what if we take an 9-iron and let the wind carry it to the front edge and let it run up to the middle of the green?"

His shot landed just short on the apron and ran up to pin-high, eight feet from the hole.

"You see? You didn't need perfect conditions to hit a great shot. You just needed to adapt your strategy."

The Transformation

Over the final two holes, I watched a different golfer emerge. When his drive on 18 found a divot in the fairway, instead of complaining, Francois smiled and said, "Okay, what's the best way to play this?" When his approach shot came up short, he stayed positive and focused on getting up and down.

The result? He made a decent score in trying conditions, after he adopted this new mindset.

The Real Lesson

As we walked off the 18th green, I shared something important with Francois: "Today, you discovered that your attitude is just as important as your technique. These three qualities of being cheerful, accountable, and adaptable have nothing to do with how talented you are or how perfect your swing is. But they'll impact your scores more than any technical adjustment ever will."

"I definitely felt different out there on the last few holes," he admitted.

"That's because you stopped fighting the game and started working with it. A cheerful golfer stays relaxed and swings more freely. An accountable golfer learns from mistakes and improves faster. An adaptable golfer finds ways to score even when things aren't perfect."

I took his scorecard and wrote three words on the back: Cheerful. Accountable. Adaptable.

"Keep this in your golf bag," I said. "Before every round, remind yourself of these three attitudes. They're not swing thoughts—they're fundamental approaches to the game that will serve you well beyond any technical tip I could ever give you."

Why Attitude Trumps Technique

Here's what I've learned in my years of coaching: you can have the most technically perfect swing in the world, but if your attitude is poor, you'll struggle to reach your potential. Golf is as much a mental game as it is physical, and your mindset directly impacts your body's ability to perform.

When you're cheerful, your muscles stay relaxed and your swing flows naturally. When you're accountable, you empower yourself to learn and improve. When you're adaptable, you turn challenges into opportunities rather than obstacles.

These aren't just golf lessons—they're life lessons that happen to make you a better golfer.

Your Challenge

The next time you play, try this experiment: Rate yourself on these three qualities after each hole on a scale of 1-10. Were you cheerful in the face of adversity? Did you take responsibility for your shots? Were you adaptable when conditions weren't perfect?

I guarantee you'll see a direct correlation between your attitude scores and your golf scores. The rounds where you stay positive, accountable, and flexible will be the rounds you remember fondly—regardless of what the scorecard says.

Think About This:

What if the difference between your current handicap and your goal handicap has less to do with perfecting your technique and more to do with perfecting your approach to imperfection? Which would be easier to change starting tomorrow?

Until next time, less swing thoughts, more great shots!

Owen.